Happy Coming Out Day!
My friend Stacey has written a piece on why she's an advocate for "gay" rights. The following is posted with her permission:
Why I'm an advocate of gay rights
Well, apart from the usual "duh! because they're citizens" reason, I will expand. When I learned about the civil rights movement of my mom and nana's time, I was fascinated and horrified. This idea that blacks were separate but equal and determined as 'other' (I'm sure you'll agree) was a revolting period in this country's history.
When we define a people as 'other' it implies a strangeness, an unfamiliarity, a non-sameness. And while each culture in this country has a uniqueness that is to be celebrated, each are still all afforded the same rights.
We belong to this 'clubhouse' called the U.S.A. We pay dues and, in return, we get protection and enjoy some privileges. The clubhouse protects us from threats through the military, works to ensure we have access to good food and clean water, works to ensure we have the tools needed to raise a family, educate ourselves, express ourselves... life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.
There are also some club rules. Don't steal from others, don't kill them, don't hurt them. You know, the common logical stuff.
Yet, in this clubhouse there are people who are paying their clubhouse dues that don't get that same protection. They are considered 'others.'
Now stick and stones can break bones, but names will never hurt people... I guess. But this 'otherness' results in some horrible things that I'm sure no one would want to experience.
Stories like in the recent occurrence in Florida in which a lesbian was denied access to her dying partner even though she had a document ensuring medical power of attorney. Their children could not say goodbye to their mother.
My mom died. I was able to say goodbye to my mother. Why couldn't these kids?
Now the 'reason' that this club member of the U.S.A. (and countless others who have experienced a similar, horrific event) was denied rights was because they weren't given the same protection the other club members have. Even though they pay the dues.
Now, this clubhouse was formed a long time ago by people fleeing religious persecution. Their countries of origin weren't allowing them to practice their beliefs. Pretty good reason to leave a country. So they all got together and started this clubhouse and, because of that big reason, they decided to lay down some ground rules so that everyone could enjoy the freedoms they were previously denied. One such freedom is written down and taught to everyone. It's called Freedom of Religion and basically means that everyone can practice their religion in their places of worship. The clubhouse will make sure of that. But it's a two way street. If the clubhouse stays out of the place of worship, the place of worship needs to stay out of the clubhouse. Sounds fair.
Even given the above, for some reason, some clubhouse members feel it is important to treat some of its members as 'others' and not give them the same protection they pay for with their dues. Why?
Well, the logical reasoning escapes me.
Let me think of reasons why some club members should not get the same privileges...
Maybe they are hurting someone?
Nope. These 'others' want to raise families and celebrate their love.
Maybe they are trying to restrict other club members privileges?
Nope. These 'others' are not trying to take away anyone's rights.
Maybe they aren't paying their dues?
Nope. They have to pay dues just like everyone else.
So what could be the reason these 'others' are not given the same privileges?
Strangely enough, it seems like some religions think what they do in the privacy of their own home is wrong. But how is it wrong? Are they hurting someone? If they are, then it's totally wrong. But their behaviors are just like other club members! They are living with a loved one and possibly raising a family. If that is hurtful, then all club members who do that should be punished as well, right?
And what boggles my mind even further is that some of these 'others' even subscribe to the same religion as those that restrict their privileges.
Why, then, do these 'others' not get the same privileges as everyone else?
Somehow we forgot about the whole reason we started the clubhouse. To escape religious persecution. To keep the clubhouse out of the place of worship and visa versa.
Wow. If you think of it like this, the clubhouse has become that which it originally despised. How did that happen? We escaped from an enemy only to become the enemy itself? That is really embarrassing.
But, don't let the embarrassment stop you from making it right. When we make a mistake the correct thing to do is to acknowledge our 'whoops' (and if you feel embarrassed, that's fine) but to fix it.
Listen, this isn't a selfish plea because I like [blank]... um, I'm straight. I could marry the person I'm attracted to.
But maybe it IS selfish. I'm an atheist. I don't even believe in anyone's religion. Maybe I should be considered an 'other.' Maybe, if this strange privilege revocation continues, I'm next. I hope not. I pay dues.
But I was raised Christian and I support and practice many Christian-like behaviors. The biggie being; do unto others as you would have done unto you. The golden rule.
*If* in this clubhouse we wish to have the freedom to love and raise a family, *then* we are compelled to protect that for every one of our club members.
I'm really proud of this club, despite this black mark in our history, because in our history we overcame prejudices in order to place other 'others' to full club standing. We overcame racial segregation. We overcame gender inequality. We are still strong enough to overcome this inequality.
Don't you agree we're strong enough to overcome this? I think so. Because I pay the dues and I see how great our clubhouse has been.
And, simply, because it is the RIGHT thing to do.
I really can't wait to be on the other side of the coin, when my kids ask me about how these 'others' were segregated with fascination and disbelief. It will be sad to acknowledge there was ever a period in our history that we did this. But what's done is done. The only important thing now is that we correct our errors.
Because, after all, this clubhouse is the "Land of the Free, Home of the Brave." I look forward to the time we can live up to that and pay tribute to the club house origins. It's called pride in what we stand for or, in other words, patriotism.
Stand up. Speak up for those that are downtrodden. Is is the most patriotic thing you can do.
When we define a people as 'other' it implies a strangeness, an unfamiliarity, a non-sameness. And while each culture in this country has a uniqueness that is to be celebrated, each are still all afforded the same rights.
We belong to this 'clubhouse' called the U.S.A. We pay dues and, in return, we get protection and enjoy some privileges. The clubhouse protects us from threats through the military, works to ensure we have access to good food and clean water, works to ensure we have the tools needed to raise a family, educate ourselves, express ourselves... life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.
There are also some club rules. Don't steal from others, don't kill them, don't hurt them. You know, the common logical stuff.
Yet, in this clubhouse there are people who are paying their clubhouse dues that don't get that same protection. They are considered 'others.'
Now stick and stones can break bones, but names will never hurt people... I guess. But this 'otherness' results in some horrible things that I'm sure no one would want to experience.
Stories like in the recent occurrence in Florida in which a lesbian was denied access to her dying partner even though she had a document ensuring medical power of attorney. Their children could not say goodbye to their mother.
My mom died. I was able to say goodbye to my mother. Why couldn't these kids?
Now the 'reason' that this club member of the U.S.A. (and countless others who have experienced a similar, horrific event) was denied rights was because they weren't given the same protection the other club members have. Even though they pay the dues.
Now, this clubhouse was formed a long time ago by people fleeing religious persecution. Their countries of origin weren't allowing them to practice their beliefs. Pretty good reason to leave a country. So they all got together and started this clubhouse and, because of that big reason, they decided to lay down some ground rules so that everyone could enjoy the freedoms they were previously denied. One such freedom is written down and taught to everyone. It's called Freedom of Religion and basically means that everyone can practice their religion in their places of worship. The clubhouse will make sure of that. But it's a two way street. If the clubhouse stays out of the place of worship, the place of worship needs to stay out of the clubhouse. Sounds fair.
Even given the above, for some reason, some clubhouse members feel it is important to treat some of its members as 'others' and not give them the same protection they pay for with their dues. Why?
Well, the logical reasoning escapes me.
Let me think of reasons why some club members should not get the same privileges...
Maybe they are hurting someone?
Nope. These 'others' want to raise families and celebrate their love.
Maybe they are trying to restrict other club members privileges?
Nope. These 'others' are not trying to take away anyone's rights.
Maybe they aren't paying their dues?
Nope. They have to pay dues just like everyone else.
So what could be the reason these 'others' are not given the same privileges?
Strangely enough, it seems like some religions think what they do in the privacy of their own home is wrong. But how is it wrong? Are they hurting someone? If they are, then it's totally wrong. But their behaviors are just like other club members! They are living with a loved one and possibly raising a family. If that is hurtful, then all club members who do that should be punished as well, right?
And what boggles my mind even further is that some of these 'others' even subscribe to the same religion as those that restrict their privileges.
Why, then, do these 'others' not get the same privileges as everyone else?
Somehow we forgot about the whole reason we started the clubhouse. To escape religious persecution. To keep the clubhouse out of the place of worship and visa versa.
Wow. If you think of it like this, the clubhouse has become that which it originally despised. How did that happen? We escaped from an enemy only to become the enemy itself? That is really embarrassing.
But, don't let the embarrassment stop you from making it right. When we make a mistake the correct thing to do is to acknowledge our 'whoops' (and if you feel embarrassed, that's fine) but to fix it.
Listen, this isn't a selfish plea because I like [blank]... um, I'm straight. I could marry the person I'm attracted to.
But maybe it IS selfish. I'm an atheist. I don't even believe in anyone's religion. Maybe I should be considered an 'other.' Maybe, if this strange privilege revocation continues, I'm next. I hope not. I pay dues.
But I was raised Christian and I support and practice many Christian-like behaviors. The biggie being; do unto others as you would have done unto you. The golden rule.
*If* in this clubhouse we wish to have the freedom to love and raise a family, *then* we are compelled to protect that for every one of our club members.
I'm really proud of this club, despite this black mark in our history, because in our history we overcame prejudices in order to place other 'others' to full club standing. We overcame racial segregation. We overcame gender inequality. We are still strong enough to overcome this inequality.
Don't you agree we're strong enough to overcome this? I think so. Because I pay the dues and I see how great our clubhouse has been.
And, simply, because it is the RIGHT thing to do.
I really can't wait to be on the other side of the coin, when my kids ask me about how these 'others' were segregated with fascination and disbelief. It will be sad to acknowledge there was ever a period in our history that we did this. But what's done is done. The only important thing now is that we correct our errors.
Because, after all, this clubhouse is the "Land of the Free, Home of the Brave." I look forward to the time we can live up to that and pay tribute to the club house origins. It's called pride in what we stand for or, in other words, patriotism.
Stand up. Speak up for those that are downtrodden. Is is the most patriotic thing you can do.
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